The most productive use of my time and energy is to rest and see what needs attention next.
So simple but not always that easy (although honestly, sometimes it truly is that easy). I’ve had to unlearn a lot of shit. I’ve had to completely dismantle and redefine what I believe that makes me a valuable person worthy of love (hint: being alive is enough). I’ve had to let go of my future and what I always thought it would be.
Read MoreThe relationship with myself that exists because I want to avoid my feelings is not a relationship I want to keep showing up for.
Read MoreI had known for a long time that this phone call was going to happen. Sadly, it was never a matter of "if" only a matter of "when".
Read MoreWelcome to another aspect of my brain my friends. I promise you at this point the longing is more torture than joy. But that’s okay. The fact that I recognize that I'm doing this and how deeply it is embedded in my brain process, is great. Now I can do something with it instead of being subject to it.
This analogy came to me this in my meditation this morning: it's as though I'm trying to grab a thing and instead of just stepping closer to it, I'm reaching and waiting for my arms to grow longer.
Read MoreThis is my goddamned blog and my shit emotional process. If I sensor myself in these environments, I'm in deep trouble. If I'm not allowed as many fucking F-bombs as I need, you can bet your sweet ass that I'm holding back other shit as well.
Read MoreThe only way to be an honest to goodness, legit badass is to be equally as vulnerable and open about it.
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